realnipple.com

I have an internet website idea I'd like to run by you folks.

It would be called realnipple.com -- which is surprisingly available, by the way. At the website, visitors would be asked to vote and rate a barrage of nipples. First, they would vote on a scale of 1 to 10 how hot they thought the nipple was. Then they would be asked if they thought it was a male or a female nipple. The trick here, of course, would be to isolate the nipples in photoshop but I could probably hire a nipple editor to work on that...

So, if visit realnipple.com in a month or so after the launch, you'll see something like this:



and then you'll vote on how hot it is (like, I think this one is probably a 6) and then you'll select whether you think it's male or female (female!). After you've voted, you'll see the correct sex of the nipple and the average ranking.

Fun, huh?


And while we're talking about nipples, I think now is as good a time as any to mention a wonderful little product I've been using for some time. It's called Nipple Development Cream. My nipples have nearly tripled in size over the last four months and the laydeeez can't get enough. And I've even got a few of them using the juice and the results have been spectacular.





For $88 you can get yourself a can of Double Strength Nipple Development Hormone Cream and watch your nipples groooooowwwwwwww!!!















Along with this ad from Mentos, it's proving to be an awfully nipply weekend for me...






Enjoy your nipples.

Viva Viagra

Earlier today I saw that new Viagra commercial for the first time. It took me a few moments to recover...

Anyway, I haven't stopped thinking about that 30 second commercial and Viva Viagra is such a catchy tune... It's just your typical impromptu jam session where dudes sing about the how much they want to run home as fast as they can and the joys of popping pills so they won't need to stray from their wives... Yeah, I know. I'm sure I'm not the only person that thinks this commercial is so brilliantly fucked up.

For those of you that haven't seen it, here it is.

Enjoy.




And I know I'm not the first person to question the standards that allow commercials like that to get broadcast on our public airwaves but the Trojan commercial below didn't make the list...



Is it because the commercial is portraying 20 somethings picking up sexual partners at a bar as opposed to wholesome 40 something men singing about popping a pill so they can faithfully boink they wife? Ah, I get it now. See, we'll never see the crossover commercial featuring a guy picking up some lady in a bar and running to the bathroom to pop a little blue pill and smiling confidently into the camera...

If you video chat with me I'll pay $3 towards your boob job

The best part about letting everyone know whenever I find something weird is that when other people find something weird, they think about me!

Just last night, my gal pal Victoria stumbled upon this matchmaking/FUNdraising/boob augmenting website and thought of me!

At My Free Implants dot com, lovely ladies that want bigger boobs are matched up with generous gents that want to buy them bigger boobs!

Yay!


Women chat with benefactors and post pictures of themselves until they raise enough money to get a new rack. Benefactors can also ask women to wear certain outfits for photos.


Apparently, the best thing about all this is "seeing the newly transformed ladies after the surgery when they return to the website to post pictures of the results. You can take pride in knowing that you helped her improve her self esteem and self image!"


I asked my friend if she would open up an account so she could improve her self image but she said her boobs were big enough and that her self image was dandy. I told her to sign up anyway to see if she could raise some money or so I could chat with benefactors.

She didn't.

So I signed up to be a benefactor and started looking for small-chested chicks to support... I browsed the eager lasses and wondered if the website was started in Portland or something because just about all the girls were white.

Yeah, LAME-O! I mean, where's the Aizhe section?

But maybe only white girls want boob jobs?

Who really knows?

If ya ever forget, the tersts will win, boy

Oklahoma recently designed a new license plate...







And no, this isn't a joke. They've seriously released a global war on terism license plate.





So... to make light of this very depressing matter, I thought we could play this fun little game...

What would be your vanity plate if you lived in Oklahoma and had one of these hideous plates? You get 7 letters or numbers.



NSYDJOB
KILTRST
FUOSAMA
NVRFRGT
BLD4OIL
4MORYRS
HIL4PRZ

A foot vagina may lead you on the greatest of journeys

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